I believe that a question that will always be the topic in every wedding you attend or perhaps you're the bride and groom, 'Can have kids d lor after this'. Cliche, I know. Been there and currently still going through it. I have people asking me 'Ei, got d ar?'.
Well, it's never and will never be the first or last time. I used to be that nosy person of asking people 'So when you wanna have kids ar?'. Often actually until I stumbled an article about why you don't ask married people this question.
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I have been married for eermmm....around 8 months now but I still don't have bun in the oven...Layman's term...pregnant. Reason being, I'm not mentally prepared plus having babies are expensive. Things are different compare to the olden days. In the olden days, majority don't take out their calculator to have rough estimation of how much will it cost to have A baby. People don't go around asking other mothers, which hospital is the cheapest or affordable. But now, including me, they do.
Everybody wants to have children of their own. Who on earth doesn't? If you hear a woman says 'Don't want kids la forever'. She's lying. Every woman has been instilled with that motherly instinct .
Apart from financially, an individual has to be mentally ready to have small feet crying in the middle of the night for milk or running around the house especially working mothers. Now, don't say 'other mothers also working what'. God created different facial shape, different body shape as well as different mentality. What does it mean? It means people are different.
Yah, yah, I've heard 'You'll never be ready for anything'. I am me and you're you. Everyone has the ability to identify your own emotion and physical strength. So you know your own capability, so do I.
Yes, I've heard 'anak itu rezeki Tuhan' too but sometimes, God works in a mysterious way. Rezeki can come in many forms even though you don't have kids. Children is an extra blessing, that I don't deny. Or, perhaps, not because of financial burden that a couple doesn't want to have kids, but instead, emotional state?
Seriously, it takes a lot to be a mother. I was 10 when I had a sister. 10 is an age where you have the ability to remember things. So I have seen the things my mother had to go through when carrying my sister. Plus, babies are a lifetime commitment. You can't sell babies like real estate. You can tell people 'Ala, sakit kejap ja' or 'When you see your babies face, all the pain will go away'.
You know, there will come a time where 'Ok, let's have kids'. I want to have kids. If not, why do I bother to get married? Just the sake of making it legal?
Again, different people has different plans as married couple. People appreciate the concerns you have but let time decide and let things flow as what He has plan for them. Insyaallah, one day, there'll be small feet running around the house.