Actually you don't because you just.............know.


This post came from the fact that a few friends had asked me on how did I know I was ready to get married *because I was the last one to get married among my group of friends*.

My ideal age to get married was at 31 and have kids at the age of 32. That was what initially planned. 

Until

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My 5 years of relationship did not worked out (personal reasons). To be honest, I freaked out. I was already 27 years old at that point of time. I thought it's gonna take another few years before I found the next man *if I find one* and I had to spend the time and effort all over again before committing to a legal matrimony. 'My plan is not gonna work this time' I said to myself.

At this age, my parents gave me the flexibility of determine my own future. Every girl dream of having a guy like their father. I was not excluded. My dad was the benchmark to find the 'perfect' husband *so I thought*. Then I gave up my plan and thinking I should just go with the flow. If it happen, it will happen. 

Then on the same year that I broke up, I met my now-husband through a friend. It was a hate-relationship at first. My intention, initially, was to hook up my friend and Juan but things change and it became the opposite. At first I thought this feeling that I had was just a rebound. I dig deeper just to know if this is what has been planned by Him. I was 28 years old at that time. 

We got closer and we had our first buka puasa together. We chat a lot and get to know more of each other. As we grew closer, I became so comfortable that I could be myself with him. A month after we  were dating, I told my dad that I wanted to get engage *of course my dad freaked out* and how we got engage was really weird *too long to write it here* but basically it was through a phone call. Talking about technology. Haha.

Although it was just a month, it felt so right and it's hard to even explain using the simplest word. Before, when I asked my friend how do they know that they're ready to spend the rest of their life getting annoyed by their partner, "You'll know when it's time". It's true.

There are no trigger button in our body saying that it is time to get married. It's a form of feeling. It can only happen when you have found the right person. I believe in fate. You can be with that person for 10 years but it doesn't mean that the both of you will end up getting married. Sometimes you just gotta let go of things and let nature take its course. God works in a way that we will not understand but there are reasons behind it.

When we first date, people say that this thing that we have, will not last. But here we are, strolling down the Taj Mahal 'legally'. At the end of the day, if you think what you're about to do is the right thing to do (taking all aspects into consideration), do it cause when you're old, those people who kept criticizing you will not be there to pick you up.